OBSCENE STORIES
INNER SKELETON-----
A 63-year-old widow was admitted to the hospital in Recife, Brazil, suffering abdominal pains. X-rays showed that she was carrying a
20-inch long skeleton of a fetus which she conceived a decade earlier. It had become lodged outside the womb and was never expelled
from her body.
FEMALE SOFA-----
A 500lb. woman from Illinois was examined in a hospital. During
the examination, an asthma inhaler fell from under her armpit, a dime was found under one of her breasts and a remote control was found
lodged between the folds of her vulva.
PRICKLY PAIR-----
In Michigan, a man came into the ER with lacerations to his penis. He complained that his wife had "...a rat in her privates..." and it bit
him during sex. After an examination of his wife, it was revealed that she had a surgical needle left inside her after a recent
hysterectomy.
PING PONG ANYONE?-----
A 20 year old man came into the ER with a stony mass in his rectum. He said that he and his boyfriend were fooling around with concrete mix,
then his boyfriend had the idea of pouring the mix into his anus using a funnel. The concrete then hardened, causing constipation and pain.
Under general anesthesia, a perfect concrete cast of the man's rectum was removed along with a ping pong ball.
BLIND DRUNK-----
A drunk staggered into a Pennsylvania ER complaining of severe pain while trying to remove his contact lenses. He said that they would
come out halfway, but they always popped back in. A nurse tried to help using a suction pump, but without success. Finally, a doctor
examined him and discovered the man did not have his contact lenses in at all. He had been trying to rip out the
membrane of his cornea.
>> > OUCH AND DOUBLE OUCH!-----
A couple hobbled into a Washington State emergency room covered in bloody restaurant towels. The man had his hands around his waist and
the woman had hers around her head. They eventually explained to doctors that they had gone out that evening for a romantic dinner.
Overcome with passion, the woman crept under the table to administer oral sex to
the man. While in the act, she had an epileptic fit, which caused her to clamp down on the man's penis and wrench it from side to side. In
agony and desperation, the man grabbed a fork and stabbed her in the head until she let go.
NOW THAT TAKES BALLS----
11/15/2001: From the KTVN channel 2 news website: In a bizaare case, right
here in Reno, a man developed elephantitis of the scrotum. His scrotum grew to
70 pounds.
There are 2 different types of elephantitis. One is found in the tropics and
cause by repeated mosquito bites. A worm gets into the skin through the bite,
then crawls around the lymphatic system and causes blockage.
The other type of elephantitis is found here in the United States. The causes
include a birth defect in the lymphatic system, repeated infections, tumors, or
following surgery. Doctors say that's the most common now a days.
Right now, a man laying in Washoe Medical Center is a medical mystery. He has
elephantitis of the scrotum. He's had it for two years now. Now it's to the
point where he can't even lift it with his hands.
So how could someone let this go on for so long? The man told us because he
didn't have the money to take care of it.
A doctor with Northern Nevada Plastic Surgery Associates finally took his case.
Normally, compression garments are used to treat elephantitis. But this man's
scrotum was so englarged, surgery was his only option. After several hours, the
doctor finally removed the excess scrotum.
The reason this man is a medical mystery is... because of his weight doctors
can't find out why he developed elephantitis. For now, they're all just assuming
he has the type of elephantitis found more in the United States.