 | 1. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired. |
| 2. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway). |
| 3. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. |
| 4. A backwards poet writes inverse. |
| 5. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that
votes. |
| 6. She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off. |
| 7. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. |
| 8. If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed. |
| 9. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. |
| 10. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor. |
| 11. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds. |
| 12. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered. |
| 13. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
Blownapart. |
| 14. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it. |
| 15. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under. |
| 16. He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key. |
| 17. Every calendar's days are numbered. |
| 18. A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine. |
| 19. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. |
| 20. He had a photographic memory that was never developed. |
| 21. A plateau is a high form of flattery. |
| 22. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at
large. |
| 23. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. |
| 24. Once you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. |
| 25. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine. |
| 26. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye. |
| 27. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis. |
| 28. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. |
| 29. Acupuncture is a jab well done. |
| 30. Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat. |
| 31. Why is it called 'taking a shit' when you don't take away anything, you
leave something behind. |
Smokr's
Lounge 
